My heart is anxious, its jumping, slamming against the walls.

I still don’t understand why I had to fall.

The regret follows me every day, this will be my pain.

Can anything I say really make him stay?

I grab his hand he pushes away, maybe I should let it all fade.

He knows some bad shit is coming his way.

I prepare myself get ready for impact.

Most likely this will be the last day we interact.

God knows I’ll probably never see him smile back.

Still here trying to attack.

The words just don’t seem to come out.

We’re both filled with so much doubt.

It all starts tumbling out,

The way my love for someone else started to sprout.

I can see the pain on his face,

But I can no longer pretend that at night I call his name.

I feel so ashamed.

“I never meant to hurt you.”

The words feel so stupid now because I caused that frown.

I’m the one that won’t walk in a gown,

Because I fell for some clown.

I relive everything that ever happened,

All the lies I once knew, I know now, our relationship is through.

He’s so hurt, he will never love me again.

Time to scribble out his name with my dark souled pen.

 

-M.A. Fernández

© 2015 Marlin Alicea Fernández, Soul to Ink. All Rights Reserved