Day 18

Free Write don’t think about it just write.

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I’ve wanted to talk about it for so long and here it is. I’m scared shitless but there’s no other way to feel. I feel the words coming out, but I’m just thinking of how everything I say can just ruin this moment. We love each other that’s clear, or is it? Maybe it is to me, maybe it has always been clear to me. But maybe it’s just been clear to me. I’ve been fighting for it so long I don’t know if I want it cause it’s real, or I’m just used to the fight. But then again no one makes me feel this way, not one other person in the world. It has always been so unique and that’s what I love about it. Yet the fear always creeps in, is it my fear or is it his? Maybe he can feel my fear and that’s why he shows his. Is there a possibility that we are just both afraid of losing each other? We want each other so bad, but we want to make sure it works. Life just wouldn’t be the same without the other. So we speak, but we come to no conclusion. We want it, that much is clear, but it seems like we’re just not meant to get what we want. Is the world such a cruel place, that it pulls away the most hopeful lovers? I don’t know what there’s left to do. So I think it’s my turn to wait. Wait for the love I crave so deeply to return to me. Wait for the day I will be set free.

-M.A.Fernández

Copyright © 2016 Marlin Alicea Fernández, Soul to Ink. All Rights Reserved